Hi everyone, I haven’t posted here in a while but I could use your input.

I’ve been struggling recently with the clear shift toward trans genocide in the United States. I don’t think we’re there yet, but things are bad, getting worse, and the course seems unalterable at this point. I find myself alternating between periods of contentedness with my own day-to-day and absolute terror at the increasingly fascistic state of this country.

I also happen to teach courses that discuss gender issues, and student attitudes have paralleled the national mood. I am now routinely dealing with hardline anti-trans students who have made my life difficult. I worry about my safety in the classroom, and especially fear being doxed by Libs of TikTok or the like.

The other day I was driving to work in a panic about the gender topics I would need to teach that day and how they would be received. I felt genuinely very anxious and afraid. I was not in an ideal headspace. So what happens? I arrive at work, start heading toward my office, and immediately overhear two coworkers discussing trans issues.

One of these colleagues is a gay philosophy professor who has expressed TERFy attitudes in the past, and this was not the first time I’ve caught him debating the cough cough “trans question” in the workplace. In the past I felt he was mostly just a liberal doofus who got exposed to TERF arguments but hadn’t pursued them deeply. But now I’m beginning to think he’s fully down the rabbit hole. Why would anyone else talk about the issue this much?

Meanwhile the person he’s discussing this with was someone I thought to be an ally. And sure enough, she seemed to be mostly defending trans people. But then I heard her use the word “pretend,” as in cis people must pretend trans people are who they say they are and I just kind of snapped.

I walked over to them and shouted (almost verbatim) YOU DON’T GET TO DECIDE WHO AND WHAT WE ARE. THIS ISN’T YOUR BUSINESS. WE AREN’T YOUR PHILOSOPHY. STICK TO WHAT YOU KNOW. and stormed off. I then immediately walked into my classroom and skipped ahead to a different unit not focused on gender.

My boss is supportive and said I won’t be getting into trouble for this. He felt I was in the right and was annoyed that the other faculty seemed less concerned with what I’d said and more concerned that their freedom of speech was being intruded upon.

It doesn’t appear there will be repercussions, but I feel a bit guilty about how things transpired while also simultaneously still very angry about what I heard. I’m just pissed as hell. What should I do?

  • Poison_Ivy [comrade/them]@hexbear.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    49
    ·
    edit-2
    4 months ago

    I walked over to them and shouted (almost verbatim) YOU DON’T GET TO DECIDE WHO AND WHAT WE ARE. THIS ISN’T YOUR BUSINESS. WE AREN’T YOUR PHILOSOPHY. STICK TO WHAT YOU KNOW. and stormed off

    So fucking based.

    My boss is supportive and said I won’t be getting into trouble for this. He felt I was in the right and was annoyed that the other faculty seemed less concerned with what I’d said and more concerned that their freedom of speech was being intruded upon.

    Your boss is correct ✅

    I’m just pissed as hell. What should I do?

    Take comfort that you are not only correct but your boss has your back.

    • AnarchaPrincess [she/her]@hexbear.netOP
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      42
      ·
      4 months ago

      My boss calls himself a Marxist, which sounds ridiculous but it’s academia. He’s only middle management anyway so I take him at his word. We talk politics a lot though and he does strike me as more of a radlib than a true communist, but there’s zero doubt he’s all-in on LGBT rights. He’s a pretty good guy.

  • nat_turner_overdrive [he/him]@hexbear.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    38
    ·
    edit-2
    4 months ago

    more concerned that their freedom of speech was being intruded upon.

    Awesome that educators are too ignorant to understand that nobody’s free speech was in any way interfered with in this scenario.

    Fuck your coworkers, don’t feel guilty for sharing your opinion with them. If they want to talk about trans issues in the workplace then they can deal with people in their workplace being disgusted by their bigotry.

    If anything your response should be to call them snowflakes who need a safe space to protect them from the consequences of their hate speech.

  • itappearsthat [he/him]@hexbear.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    32
    ·
    edit-2
    4 months ago

    That fucking sucks but I think you acted well. Pointing out that they’re jerking themselves off intellectually with abstract blathering about something with a concrete impact on your personal life is a great way to burst these arguments. They know they have to come up with some way to account for you within their half baked belief system but cannot, and this bothers them.

  • Kuori [she/her]@hexbear.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    26
    ·
    4 months ago

    but I feel a bit guilty about how things transpired

    don’t. you did the right thing. cis people need to learn when to shut the fuck up

  • Owl [he/him]@hexbear.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    19
    ·
    4 months ago

    If he calls it “the trans question” then he’s a full on nazi, and the only question is how to safely dispose of him. Does he say that kind of thing in broad enough company that someone other than you could plausibly out his hate speech? Are there militant antifa groups in your region?

    The person who said “pretend” could’ve just said something shitty while exasperated by arguing with someone awful. You should definitely let her know it’s shitty. I don’t think it means that’s what she secretly believes. Or maybe she’ll show her whole ass later.

    • AnarchaPrincess [she/her]@hexbear.netOP
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      13
      ·
      edit-2
      3 months ago

      He didn’t use that exact phrase but has used the word question closely enough to the word trans that it stood out to me. He’s not fash though, he’s a fully libbed up Dark Brandon guy. Potato potahto though of course.

  • Sphere [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    19
    ·
    4 months ago

    No reason to feel guilty, it doesn’t seem like you said anything out of line. Don’t let your sense of decorum tell you your comments weren’t entirely warranted. And if you were a bit…emphatic about it, well, they shouldn’t be debating other people’s identities and right to exist.

    Glad to hear your boss is giving you the support you deserve. cat-trans

  • Philosoraptor [he/him, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    18
    ·
    edit-2
    4 months ago

    I’m not sure if you’re in philosophy or another discipline, but professional philosophy is kind of a dumpster fire about this right now. While there are lots and lots of allies in the discipline, there are also lots and lots of people who think “asking hard questions is our job” can and should shield them from all the problems associated with doing this shit. Convincing them that “should trans people exist?” is not a question in the same class as “does redness exist?” is proving to be a discouragingly uphill battle.

    I’m sorry that happened to you. You should name that philosophy professor so we can bully him on Twitter and at conferences, unless that risks doxxing you as well.

  • D61 [any]@hexbear.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    16
    ·
    edit-2
    3 months ago

    At first I was thinking that every time you overhear somebody use the phrase “trans question”, very loudly shout the question, “Did you just say, 'Jew Question? Like… Nazis?”

    YOU DON’T GET TO DECIDE WHO AND WHAT WE ARE. THIS ISN’T YOUR BUSINESS. WE AREN’T YOUR PHILOSOPHY. STICK TO WHAT YOU KNOW.

    marx-guns-blazing skeleton-motorcycle

    But what you said was probably better.

    but I feel a bit guilty

    Anarchaprincess, did nothing wrong. spongebob-i-fucking-love