Medications are made for people. You are a person. You are deserving of care and medication.
I’m sorry you are feeling this way. I know it’s hard to be understanding with yourself, especially after experiencing rejection, but you shouldn’t take the blame. We, as a society, have the resources to care for everyone. It’s not your fault specifically that these resources are distributed poorly.
Other people with disabilities in my life have expressed similar concerns to yours, so I guess I can say this is not an unfamiliar topic to me. Things I have discussed with these people are, for example, that our civilisation can and should be aimed at supporting and including everyone. Otherwise, it would be the same as arguing that a bat is more worthy of living in the forest than a rat, because it can fly and the rodent can’t. Which is, of course, absurd.
Baby’s got the diarrhoea