You used to be able to eat leaded paint chips when I was a boy, now you can’t because of woke
We need to go back in time and massacre the entire John Birch Society. I know the time-travel assassination list is getting unmanageably long but the John Birchers need to go.
John Birch Society
If I remember correctly they peaked in the 1960s with their anti-communist nonsense conspiracy theories and general public didn’t even know who they were. And anybody who did know - knew they were nuts. But now nonsense conspiracy theories are mainstream though for republicans.
My understanding is that they had a strong, strong influence on right wing thought and many of their ideas have dispersed in to wider Fash culture. They haunt us from beyond the grave, cruel specters clawing at our anti-cavity toothpaste.
I wonder if ~60 years ago the JBS toyed with the idea of antivax avant la lettre. But they decided that was too batshit even for them.
“Bring back polio!” - Mr birch society
The fluoride in the water is the only thing holding my teeth together nooooo
Bring back leaded paint and all those dangerous pigments in artist paint. I want arsenic green again. Put asbestos everywhere. It’s a miracle material. I’m tired of my engine knocking so we need lead in gasoline. Lead paint, leaded gas, you know what, just give us more lead. Lead is how leaders are born. It’s the spice melange, it’s the mojo, it’s the essence of greatness. Finally, put the coke back in coke and make codeine OTC.
Shit’s getting so clownish that I think there’s a chance that persistent boomer politicians and maybe some Gen-X junior boomers will say that they had lead in everything and turned out fine and that the reason people are weak these days is they need the lead back.
Let arsenic return as coloring agent for candy! Why have I been denied this delicious tasty treat?
They used to have radium twinkies. Think of all the delicious spicy air they’ve taken from us.
I thought this was a free nation
You can still get a lot of the dangerous artist paints. I know because I have some of them lol
Letting all my teeth fall out to own the libs.
Trump has really been picking up all the losers this cycle
Funnily enough Portland of all places does not fluorinate their water partly due to pressure from craft brewing and artisanal coffee roasters.
That is a Portlandia sketch and i refuse to believe it.
Fluoride in water is good. I spent a few weeks in a place without and got a cavity.
The only thing that has faltered my opposition to Kamala is the damage that this one guy might do.
Robert F. Kennedy or Trump?
Yes
RFK obviously
If you want a vision of the future, it’s this, forever.
Anticipating a return of the Hayes Code by decade’s end
It’ll be chuddier somehow, like “plastic cishet fanservice is okay but any (D-word slur that nazis use to describe people too different) is forbidden.”
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I really don’t rule out an actual “comics code” for games, driven by “trad” chuds in political office, that requires shit like that.
Time to invest in dental stocks
They’re putting chemicals in the water to make my teeth gay
Topically applied fluoride does not prevent tooth decay. It does render teeth detectable by spy satellite.
I was wondering why my dentist always knew my location at all times…
I’ve already seen conservative memes about how they removed the lead in gasoline and house paint because the lead is what protected us from their radiation (I’m assuming that’s how they spread wokeism).
Guaranteed if there aren’t already: there will be people who start selling lead additives so you can start mixing them into the paint and gas yourself within the next 4 years.
