Basically being left out of the group but for life 😀
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You can all be in my group
except I don’t have a group
I feel so alienated from everyone else that I despair sometimes of ever making a friend, of ever falling in love. I’m so lonely it’s killing me. Very dark thoughts lately. I don’t know what to do.
I feel less and less on the same wavelength with my old friends. I think it’s part of getting older but it still sucks. I think I’ve just let my brain wander too far out there and now I can’t come all the way back.
I went through an intensely lonely period a few years ago. I know it’s not something you can change overnight, but you have to become comfortable with being alone. That’s not too say you always will be, but you need to be your own best friend. I used to beat myself up a lot, then I started thinking that I wouldn’t talk to somebody I care about the way I talk to myself, and that’s not ok. Learn to enjoy your own company, take good care of yourself, and focus on your well-being. You’ll be ok.
i just fill myself with false confidence. everyone loves me, even the people who hate me
I’ve been told time and again how “confident” I am even though it’s not confidence, it’s an incredible degree of composure I’ve attained by working grocery while being in the worst emotional pain imaginable for years. I actually have shit self-esteem and don’t really try anything because I’m overwhelmed and I never really learned how to weather failure properly. Or rejection.
Love being told “it took me a while to understand you. You just say what you mean and don’t hide anything. It’s kinda weird. You’re too honest and it creeps me out.”
That person is no longer an associate of mine.
I’ve been told “people can change their mind” more times than I can count
Fuck me for expecting people to say what they mean, right?
I’m still coming to grips with this being part of being on the spectrum and I’ve felt this all my life. Only recently got daliagnosed.
For a long, long time, I just marked it up as me being “brutally honest” when I realized I can’t even say white lies to save people from hurt feelings or whatever. It’s a whole nother world realizing how frustrating existing has been trying to wade through what people are actually saying.
I have trouble making friends but this seem a little over the top to me.
I don’t like new people. Nobody does. How are you supposed to like someone you don’t know anything about? Friendship takes time and immediately assuming everyone hates you isn’t going to help. You’re correct, they don’t like you but you’re wrong if you assume they dislike you.
Also if you do happen to find someone who’s knee jerk reaction to meeting a new person is to hate is not a person to befriend.
I think this comment explains why making friends post-high school has never worked for me. You’re just expected to meet a random person and make some sort of connection with them right away and/or find a way to keep in contact with them
I know people who are able to do this without trying and I’m so jealous
Even worse - you make a connection with some you think is cool then you find out afterwards they’re a chud.
This is one of my biggest issues. I have a D&D friend who I’ve known for over 2 years and he’s starting to show hints of chuddery. It’s really difficult for me to ignore and it’s making me like him a lot less as a person.
But what am I supposed to do? It’s difficult just to meet strangers and for a connection to develop. Expecting they’re on the same page as you politically on top of that is almost never going to happen.
