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  • bolshevikLovelace [she/her, love/loves]@hexbear.net
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    2 months ago
    art is cool and shit

    this time last year i went to a public art gallery and saw this painting:
    “Sometimes I wonder” by Anne Wallace

    it was the only thing there that made me cry (just a tiny bit, i wasn’t taking estrogen yet). i kinda explained my feelings as “feeling held back by capitalism, like i can’t figure out who i really want to be because work doesn’t allow me the time”. sometimes i would wonder if i could be someone else and maybe actually be comfortable with who i was…

    we went again today and it was still up, i had a bit of a laugh at myself when i realised it was just my gender dysphoria on a canvas lmao. like the original sentiment was correct, i was feeling held back. sure, by porky-happy but more so by my gender and addressing that helped me enjoy life way more. i was able to actually enjoy finding a bit of a personality because i no longer had to share it behind a mask of masculinity

    so yeah, pretty funny to see it again post-trans-hatch. maybe seeing it the first time helped accelerate that a little bit, who knows