It’s incredibly subtle but if you take the first letter of each word in “Department Of Government Efficiency” you get DOGE, which is also the abbreviation of a popular memecoin Musk has shilled before. What a fascinating coin-cidence!

Perhaps they should have called it the Bastard Asshole Youth Criminals. Headed by the world’s oldest child prodigy.

Not at all innocent, no. But I’d rather see the exchanges suffer than the small fry retail speculators (though I can still laugh at them).

I see. You should maybe know that while it’s true in a sense, a lot of people don’t like that phrase very much. It’s a cliché cryptocurrency fans recite in response to any issues with cryptocurrency exchanges and I among others feel it serves to downplay the responsibility of the exchanges and blame the victims.

Securely taking care of an offline crypto wallet is somewhat more complicated and technically involved than just having an account on an exchange site. That the easiest way to use cryptocurrency is also an insecure one speaks of a major usability problem in the whole ecosystem.

More importantly, exchange sites offer what is essentially a bank account with little of the accountability of an actual bank. If a bank gets hacked and loses all your money or freezes your account for frivolous reasons, people generally don’t go “well you should have stored your money in cash inside your mattress instead”. (I guess some do, but they deservedly get the stink eye from people in polite society)

I dislike cryptocurrencies and have little trouble having vindictive schadenfreude when coiners and their platforms keep being embarrassed time and time again, but I know the real problem are the corporations and the tycoons, so I don’t like their responsibility being shifted on the least informed and most vulnerable group of retail users, who are also the most likely ones to use these exchange platforms and thereby not hold their own keys.

What a snappy slogan. Did you come up with it all by yourself?

I’ll respect their decision to voluntarily retract their crypto apologetics and not bore you with it. Just a bit funny to pre-empt anti-crypto rants on a forum called Buttcoin on a site called Awful Systems.

Inb4 people go on a rant about cryptocurrency

inb4 people do exactly the thing this subsection of this website is intended for

Die, blockchain! You don’t belong in this world!

It was not by my hand that I was once again given silicon. I was called here by humans who wish to make a quick buck.

Quick buck? You steal men’s money and make them your marks!

Perhaps the same could be said of all hypetech.

Your words are as empty as my wallet! Crypto ill needs a chain such as you!

What is crypto? A miserable little pile of scams. But enough talk. Have at you!

Basically a tagline for Awful dot Systems except honestly the despair isn’t that much more worse or especially less worse elsewhere so I might as well have the peer support.

Breaks my heart to agree with Trump on anything.

Investigating a user for a sus body shaming post, banning them for a programming drama post. Truly a self at awful dot systems moment. Never change (meaning this sincerely, thanks for the good mod work).

My prediction begins with a confession, for I have sinned. Seven years ago a younger, more foolish me purchased a small sum of Bitcoin out of curiosity. I had forgotten about this until just recently, when I found an old notebook where I had recorded the keys to access the accursed asset. The news about the price peaking after the election made me decide to take at least some advantage out of the result, so I cashed out, earning a tidy profit, which I dutifully reported to the state revenue service.

My prediction for the rest of the year is that as a penance for my transgression, I will spend the ill-gotten gains from my destructive action to poison my body and mind with concoctions of ethanol.

What the hell do people think they’re adding to the conversation with quips like this? We were talking about how social media personalities should be better role models. Should parents be good role models? Yes, but that’s only relevant to the discussion, if you mean to imply it’s not a problem that social media entertainers are bad ones, and that parents being good ones just solves any issues.

critical support

The name and face of the most subscribed man on YouTube keeps changing every few years but my perpetual dislike of him keeps being validated.

Jim Morrison on Ed Sullivan show

Complaining that people are just ripping off better known NFTs is pretty funny when the chain is named Ape of all things.

I should get in the habit of Googling “how to renew expiring fed mitm certificate” every few weeks for the microscopic chance the joke might some day pay off big time.

What mystery creator? The guy’s name is right there in the paper: Satoshi Nakamoto. Isn’t he the Pokémon guy or something?

Glad I’m not the only one.

And then… suddenly just as I Elon kissed me passionately. Elon climbed on top of me and we started to make out keenly against a cybertruk. He took of my $8 and I took of his 🤔. I even took of my punk. Then he put his splurp juis into my astro-ape and we did it for the first time.

"Oh! Oh! Oh! " I screamed. I was beginning to get an lamborgasm. We started to pump n dump everywhere and my pale body became all warm. And then….

“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING YOU MOTHERFUKERS!”

It was….Peter Thiel!