You all should donate more. Even if it’s just 10usd a year or something. By the looks of it, there’s a lot of tenners to be gained

I should preface this by saying I’ve already been somewhat convinced that it’s worth trying to get hrt

That said I’m really happy for you that it panned out like that. And I’m somewhat relieved to hear it.

Sorry if this is rambly and venty. I tried to stay coherent

–

Right now, I already look queer. I get called names by strangers in the street, I’ve been a hair from being assaulted by a stranger in the middle od the day before, and that’s just by looking gay (in a theoretically fairly progressive country). What I’m saying is, I think I can trust the people I’ve got around me. They’re not the problem.

The problem is that right now when I give a kid a high five, I get a nasty look, and I understand. I present myself as a dude, after all. But if I start trying, I don’t think that’ll stop, but it’ll hit so so so much harder. Just an example, of course, but you get what I’m saying

I’m afraid of trying and looking in the mirror and still not being able to like who I see, or maybe even liking it less than who I was before. I don’t want to be feminine. I dislike women’s clothes and makeup. I just don’t want to be a man, but I feel like achieving that externally will be much harder without those things to support the image. My body has used its growing time to grow into the broad strokes of a man, and no amount of HRT is going to change that. Sure, fat will shift around eventually, I would grow boobs (dont think I want to. Not 100% sure tbh), but my face won’t be demasculinized, my voice won’t get un-fucked (I have been training my voice but that’s not the point). I don’t think I could live with myself if I actually tried and I still didn’t get any closer to being happy.

So I guess that’s why I’m really so apprehensive about HRT.

Well, that and waiting lists being measured in years, if they’re open at all, meaning it’s easy to just give up.

Well, considering these are women’s laxatives, I suppose that would be considered theft

The only way I would use windows is if I was paid

How much, though? Let’s say yearly. Don’t forget this also applies to servers. Don’t try to get sneaky with android.

Pink bottle

I’m not really sure how to reply, but I want you to know I appreciate what you wrote a lot. Thank you

I think you owe it to yourself to try estrogen

You’re probably right. You kinda made me want to again

(Put the rest in a spoiler bc idk the tone kinda sucks)

It sounds like we share(d) a lot of feelings.

I’ve only been on 4tran once, out of morbid curiosity. It seems like an awful place, but a lot of what was being said was at the very least familiar to me. Not sure where I got it from.

Thank you for writing about your experience. It genuinely meant a lot to read.

Thanks for telling me :)

I get dysphoric around trans people, because they’re a present reminder of the fact that I haven’t put a single step in any direction in terms of gender. A reminder of how I feel unfixable. Of how my testosterone puberty could’ve been prevented. It’s got nothing to do with the person in question. Some days I have the same with cis people, mostly women. A reminder of how different things would’ve been if I’d landed a coinflip the right way up. It makes it hard to go outside tbh.

What I might lose by HRT is a sense of normalcy in my discomfort. I’m not a woman. I’m not sure what feminizing hormones would make me feel. I don’t hate most of my masculine features, I just hate that they make me a “man”. Plus, I’m likely to lose the family I currently still depend on because the housing market is a mess. I’m afraid of losing the social safety that I have now. That said, I hate being treated as a man. What fucks me up the most is that I see trans women get treated as if they’re men¹, which defeats the purpose for me, as I despise being seen as a man, not my secondary sex characteristics. My thoughts are a bit scattered but I think you probably understand what I mean

¹: this felt really shitty to write, but it does happen and it is a concern of mine

I understand. I wouldn’t say I act bigoted towards trans people, though. I try my best not to, anyway. I go to protests, stand up for and support people around me and am open about being nonbinary.

I understand why you said what you said in your removed comment as well. But what do you expect from me? To get over myself? I’m not trying to hurt the people around me. It’s not like I want to hate myself, or that I don’t recognize that it’s a problem. Working on it alone just hasn’t been enough.

I’m sorry that you felt what you did because you read my post.

Thank you for taking the time to read, and for the kind words

From a reverse image search, it seems to originate from @ATOMIKSAIKO on Twitter, who seems to be a real artist.

I would be very happy with a WhatsApp-esque ‘scan this QR code and be done’

There is a QR login feature in the Matrix spec, but far from every client/server supports it. IIRC it works in reverse, where the logged-in session shows the QR code. I’m actually in favor of this choice, as it means the user shouldn’t need to specify the homeserver address on the new client. I believe this doesn’t transfer your private key, though, meaning you would still have to enter your recovery key, recovery passphrase or go through the emoji thing. I could be wrong about any of this, it’s been a long time since I’ve last tried the QR login.

To me it feels like there’s a lot more friction than with WhatsApp or Signal, but to be frankly honest, I don’t really know how to solve the problem either.

self-conscious

CW: A little crass
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qy-UZ5B38-Y

Cool, thanks!

I got the same popup on fennec lol

Are you all on OVH, then? Maybe my IP is the just the problem. Or do you all perhaps have older domains? Did you do any IP warming? I’d love to know. The openness of email is important.

(And fwiw, I’m not the same person as who implied you’d have to pay. In fact, I’ve never heard of that before)

Login interface in Tempus has no SSO option.

Yes, I know. You said that.

Since you’re dissapointed about that, I figured there would be another client that does have support for SSO. I was asking you which client that would be.

Right now, you can’t. Tuwunel has had migration from Synapse on the roadmap since forever (it’s issue #2 on gh)

So for the time being, if you’re on synapse, you’re stuck on synapse

Exactly!! This really needs to change.

Security is important, of course, but it’s not like vodozemac is that good anyway…