My fake rural fake hick fake small town is showing the fucking Matt Walsh flick. This is a town where people drive immaculate lifted trucks to get Starbucks (and can’t reach down far enough to get the coffee) and slow down before driving where the road was torn up because they dont wanna damage their shocks, they were the cleanest cowboy boots you’ve ever seen to an office gig, it’s too big to be a small town and too small and conservative to be a city, there’s one museum hidden behind some kind of maze at the local library except for the museum that shows off “ancient” farming equipment like og tractors from 100 years ago

They didn’t screen I Saw The TV Glow, the didn’t screen Civil War, they didn’t screen It Ends With Us, oh but they’ll screen Matt Walsh. And they’re probably right that it’ll sell out.

They are screening Megalopolis though which honestly is just a weird decision given the above

Oh shit didn’t realize we had blue pills here, yes yes the matrix was just a movie and dorpheus was just a prank in the office

This is a very French view of cheating lol - dunno why but it’s actually not a big deal over there

On the one hand, the worst thing that can happen to someone is that they get everything they ever wanted

On the other hand, the matrix taught us that even the Paradise simulation couldn’t work because the human mind would rebel.

Instead, allow me to present the Samsara Midnight Realm Cube. They get roughly the median life in america with all the attendant miseries and temporary happiness that implies, BUT it’s just slightly degraded and worse. Like the movie Wristcutters.

Imagine the combination of watching family guy AND the gentle caress of a tender lover

A while ago they came to my door every weekend. One time, the preacher guy brought a nice lady in a pretty dress - I’m assuming to tempt me to join. My ex answered the door the next week in just their bra and jeans lol

They never came back.

Um… you know…

The UK not having mixing taps is ridiculous, I’ve heard of why - something to do about having seperate pipes possibly one had lead? But cmon, join us in this millennium. Mixing taps.

But they’re absolutely right about having fuses in their plugs. That’s inspired.

thats why I drink monster 🫡

Waxing is nice too for smooooth

Could’ve easily borrowed Ruritania, same energy

Kerry posting was a weird bit made weirder by being sustained, made me chuckle once then feel annoyed then eventually made me laugh one more time then back to being annoyed

THANK FUCK YOU SAID IT

I wanted to, I had to use all my willpower not to do it, it was driving me CRAZY

You can develop new allergies over time. Or just have been allergic this whole time but it was so mild it didn’t do much than maybe make something weird taste “spicy” or upset your stomach

If I had a Twitter or whatever and just posted my random thoughts, some might do well. But I’m also obsessed with stutff like human sushi. My tumblr timeline would look… well probably not different from anyone else’s lol.

I watched the last tree house of horror, haven’t seen one in I think a decade. Her voice is just kind of sad now

“Staph A, what’s that? Does she have to take the antibiotics?”

Oh no, I’ve become one of those healthcare workers that forgot how to talk to regular people 😱 - I’m sorry, I will tell you next time it’s a type of bacteria FIRST before listing the shortened nickname

This is how we got a post op kidney stone lithrotripsy lady in who didn’t know they were going through her urethra, it wasnt explained in normal people language and she didnt feel she could ask questions I guess - although there were a lot of failures that happened to make it so that she didn’t know her urethra and vagina were 2 different things… poor gal.

I am SO ready to be done work. I still picked up an extra shift this weekend and a few days ago but I’m just exhausted.

https://www.marxists.org/archive/marx/works/1867-c1/commodity.htm