ObamaSama [he/him]

  • 0 Posts
  • 86 Comments
Joined 6 months ago
cake
Cake day: May 28th, 2024

help-circle



  • Mutual interests are the best way! You can skip past awkward small talk and just chat about something you’re both interested in. There are loads of social hobbies that are great ways to meet people, just pick one that you’re interested in and try to find a local group for it. I’ve met some great people from board game meetups, running groups, scuba diving, protests, you name it.

    It’s also incredibly easy to make friends with other expats if you’re traveling in other countries, they’re usually also lonely and directionless so they’re much more open to hanging out with randos. Staying in a hostel is pretty much a guaranteed way to meet some cool people! Locals are also more forgiving if you’re a little “eccentric” since there isn’t the same expectation of following all the unspoken social norms that some ND people can struggle with. Obviously don’t be an obnoxious tourist with no respect for local customs but like, you have some extra wiggle room in interpersonal interactions. I know travel is a very privileged thing but I highly recommend it if you’re able to.

    Last year I was incredibly depressed with literally one friend and almost never left the house. I’m now a bona fide social butterfly making new friends every time I go out, you CAN make that change. It’s a matter of getting out there and putting yourself in situations where you can meet people. It does take courage and a willingness to be open and vulnerable to others, just taking that first step can be scary. However, I’ve realized that people are way less judgmental and cliquey than I previously thought. If you approach people with genuine respect and sincerity they’re not going to give a fuck about all the silly little things you’re insecure about and will usually reciprocate that same respect.



  • That’s good, I’m definitely the opposite. I’m overly self conscious about becoming sloppy and obnoxious around others so I reel it back, if I’m alone I’m way less aware of how drunk I am and end up in a depressive spiral until I pass out. It does sound like a snarky joke but I tried my best to minimize time alone where I would normally want to drink by forcing myself to go out with friends more. Not necessarily even drinking with them (although usually at least a bit) but just getting outside my own head and touching grass helped reduce my desire to drink quite a bit.

    Idk what kind of demons you’re trying to drown but they’re probably not going anywhere any time soon if you keep trying to tackle them on your own. I know it’s a lot easier said than done but I’ve managed to make a lot of good friends in the past few months by really making an effort to get out there and distance myself from environments I know are not good for my mental health. Even something as simple as going for a run can be really helpful to pull yourself out of a rut just by physically distancing yourself from it all







  • I’ve met some really good people through dating apps but it really is a numbers game. I’d say that on average out of 100 matches I only have 4-5 conversations that last longer than a few days before one of loses interest and stops replying. It can be pretty disheartening to churn through so many people but from my experience it pays to be picky. I’ve only ever been on 5 dates through dating apps but they all turned into relationships because I didn’t waste my time with anyone I didn’t feel a mutual connection with.

    Stick with it and eventually you’ll find someone, just gotta be patient. Also it depends on where you are but I’ve found bumble to be the best as the girls on there are usually much more serious


  • I bounced off of other paradox games pretty quickly but this one grabbed me immediately. Like others have said, it’s a materialism simulator where your internal politics actually matter and are directly affected by how you play. It’s also a lot of microing supply and demand of various resources with local and global economies interacting. It’s less plotting to assassinate a rival leader and more plotting to tank their economy by becoming the biggest exporter of steel. There are a lot of systems going on but for me it felt really intuitive just from a basic understanding of material drivers of politics and economics






  • I’m in Sapporo right now and it’s unfortunately nearly burger levels of car brain. The buses and trains run once or twice an hour with very limited routes, I couldn’t even go to the big national park just south of here via public transit. My gf was quite shocked at how poor the public transit here compared to Tokyo so just be aware that if you come to Hokkaido you really need a car