I spoke about it before but whenever I have things I need to do, I find myself putting them off even when I’m out of the house in no small part because of how constantly busy traffic is. I may live in the middle of nowhere, but it’s car dependent so there are near constant traffic jams.

Even at the grocery store I find myself wandering aimlessly because of how constantly packed the place is. The gym? It’s full all the time too so it’s hard for me to actually do my workout. When I’m actually in traffic I feel myself getting more and more angry and irritated. I despise how poverty forces me to stay a basement dweller in rural Ohio, I despise how slow going from point a to point b is because of how busy traffic is at all times. It makes me sad seeing fire trucks not go anywhere because of how backed up traffic is.

I think it’s cutting a lot into my productivity in trying to find a job and get myself off my feet when I have to take care of other things, and I wonder if any neurodiverse people feel the same way.

  • redtea@lemmygrad.ml
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    17 days ago

    This is the secret. It doesn’t cut the pain of driving completely. And it took me a long time to learn. But it improves the process. That and cruise control so I can concentrate on the road rather than the speed.

    • fakir@lemm.ee
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      17 days ago

      Yep our strength is recognizing things objectively for what they are (I am the traffic) and then optimizing for lowest personal effort required to solve repeating problems (commute).

      • CoolerOpposide [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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        17 days ago

        It sounds so simple but unfortunately being in the car majorly sucks and can easily distract you from the goal which is not only to get through the traffic, but also to not have the worst time in the world and make yourself miserable while doing it

        • fakir@lemm.ee
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          17 days ago

          Oh I agree, I’ve been plenty miserable. Your goal is to get from point a to point b safely while minimizing personal misery and exhaustion. But be miserable long enough and you’ll realize there’s not much you can change about your circumstances but only how you respond to them. Optimizing for self preservation means trying not to get too angry or worked up about things outside of your control and applying minimal effort in getting the job done.

    • CoolerOpposide [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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      17 days ago

      Of course nothing could cut the pain of driving completely, especially in traffic, but this method legit has saved me so many meltdowns and faux pas over the years. The funny thing about it is that you have to unlearn driving that way like you have to unlearning masking. If you drive the way neurotypicals drive, who also hate driving in traffic, how do you think that’s going to make you feel?

      Also this method saves you a ton of money. It’s expensive to make your car keep speeding up just to slow it down again.