Imagine seeing one of these and believing you’re so special that you don’t drain other people’s social batteries. So you get offended when you learn that you do.
You’ve just charged my battery!
Not everyone feels drained by talking to people. I’d say most people don’t. Some people, a lot of people actually, get energized talking with people.
Not everyone feels drained by talking to people
And those people wouldn’t be wearing this pin.
People that feel drained from socializing feel that way with everybody.
I get energized from conversation and would totally wear this pin
I think it would be funny to slide it up throughout a social event
I think you described quite accurately the difference between introverts and extroverts.
Extroverts gain energy with social interaction whereas it costs energy for introverts to be in these social interactions.
Something something social vampirism?
Two extroverts talking would be both charging without anyone being drained. Masturbatory vampirism.
Hehehe. Thanks for the chuckle!
I believe scientific studies say it’s somewhere around half of each.
The reason you don’t see that, is because it’s considered socially unacceptable to get socially drained, so we learn to hide it, usually from very young.
Yeah I was very ready to disagree with it being most people as that is far from my experience. I also come from one of those northern european countries that others describe as cold and closed of because we have a much more introvert aligned culture. And the fact that I’m someone who gets drained probably also biases my sample to more like minded people.
This pin is not made for them. What is your point?
The point is that you don’t need to think you’re special, or have some unique arrogance to think that you don’t drain people’s batteries. Younger extroverts have no awareness that there are people who get drained through human interactions.
Ok then we are on the same boat and I misunderstood you
oh i get energy alright, the energy and will to leave as soon as possible
Mine would always be red.
Well maybe if you remember to plug it in every once in awhile
So that’s what I was doing wrong, just needed to use a plug to recharge!
Yeah, just make sure to plug it into the right port this time.
An icepick counts as a plug, right?
This plug is not meant to enter an electric socket, mind you!
Ive been considering getting one of these honestly. as an introvert there are just some days where I really don’t want to talk to people but retail doesn’t care about that and I need money. at least having some kind of gague seems better than just glowering and hoping i don’t have to deal with small talk
You’d just be drawing more attention to yourself… Or inviting a challenge
I’d rather take that then yet another soulless ‘how are you today’
just reply with “no, i’m not”
Do it the German way and just trauma dump. I mean if they didn’t care they shouldn’t have asked.
In Germany “how are you” is also smalltalk but you are not expected to lie. Just keep it short.
“Wie geht’s?”
“Nicht so gut gerade und bei dir?”
People do that to me all the time. I just seem to radiate safety and people dump everything. I get that they need it, and sometimes (when I’m in a good headspace) I’m happy to provide an outlet for people who need one, but it gets really exhausting. I don’t even like small talk, I only bother with pleasantries because I’m supposed to, apparently.
(That trauma dumping is totally not the norm around here…)
i’ve tried that but then we both lose
You don’t think people would go “aww how come you are down? Let me cheer you up”?
It’s worth realizing some people do not want to be cheered up. My understanding is the misery, for lack of a better word, is more comforting to many as it reminds them of when they were young (or they emulate what they saw around them as children)
It’s worth realizing some people do not want to be cheered up.
I get that 100% and, although I am sure I made the mistake before, I am trying hard to understand and respect these boundaries
I am just saying I believe wearing such a pin to avoid people would have a noticeable cobra effect
Ahh I get u now. Yeah, that’s totally true
“let me fix that for you”
- drags it to positive
isn’t that how batteries work though
imagine flirting with someone and she slides her genderfluid pronoun pin from she/her to he/they
That would be awesome for a person with a compatible gender. Like, you are so interesting and attractive I’m willing to expand my horizons.
Thats gotta be the funniest fucking trans joke I have seen in A LONG TIME.
IM NOT BEING SARCASTIC BTW, I MEAN THIS. God I wish I could give awards…
Is this supposed to be indicating a problem because like if you like a person why should it matter what gender they are?
i honestly have no idea what this would indicate i sorta spat it out automatically like an llm
Ah, okay, thanks for explaining to us.
I thought people agreed about being born gay and stuff? Are you saying you think it’s a choice?
I wouldn’t take it as a slight. If they’re like me, any social interaction, even a pleasant one drains my battery
I was thinking about gamifying spoon theory in a similar manner.
It’s in Balatro style. Normally, you have a limited number of spoons each day, which you need to spend on doing things. If you overspend one day, it will raise your burnout levels and your meltdown chance, as well as having less spoons for the next few days. However you can gain various extra spoons and/or kitchen utensils, so you can have a better chance at surviving the day.
Isn’t spoon theory just a convoluted way of saying you have limited energy for daily life activities?
Yes. Why spoons? Makes no sense.
I think it is a case of using a purposefully absurd metaphor because more straight forward ones are too obviously in conflict with basic immutable, toxic aspects of people’s belief systems (drilled and blasted through in their childhoods) that function to labotomize their empathy for the hardships of others.
You know how like other cultures use fairy tales and myths to talk about taboos or impossible truths so does “western” culture use the absurd framework of spoons to talk about the “impossible” state of being incapable of what the ruling class demands of us daily.
Poké Ball Theory
From the wiki, the idea comes from an essay that somebody has written about a conversation they had with a friend about the struggles of chronic illness. The conversation took place at a restaurant, and she grabbed the spoons for use in a metaphor because there were spoons nearby. She gave her friend a set of spoons, and every time her friend mentioned doing a task, she took a spoon away.
It could have been anything, but spoons happened to be at hand and she wanted to make a physical representation of an abstract concept. The essay resonated with people, so spoons became entrenched. And now I hear people say that they’re all out of spoons to express the idea that they’ve done all that they can that day.
Oh. I thought it was supposed to be about how hard it would be to do stuff while carrying around spoons in your hands all day.
I like to use D&D’s concept of spell slots. Some activities are cantrips, I can do them every day no problem. Other activities may need a leveled spell slot, and depending on what else I need to do I might not have a spell slot available, or may need to use a higher level spell slot for a low-level activity.
Main difference is a long rest IRL doesn’t always give me all my spell slots back.
Yes but for some reason when you tell people you don’t have energy they don’t believe you. Because they think mental energy is an infinite resources you can just force out or something
I’m a big proponent of fork theory.
Basically, fork this shit we are all forking forked.
spoon theory
Thanks for introducing me to a new concept (or at least a term for it), always nice to learn something new.
One spoon is enough for me thanks
I’m literally eating with my hands right now.
I’ve actually bought some of these for some autistic children I used to work with. It gave them agency, even if they weren’t able to communicate it verbally.
Looks like various places sell them, here’s an Etsy one I found: https://www.etsy.com/listing/1596896586/my-social-battery-funny-lapel-pin-hard
Cheaper on Aliexpress - https://www.aliexpress.us/item/3256805606378142.html
How are they so cheap? Also how can that other person just resell them marked up and not feel like an asshat?
I’d quite like one of these so I can adjust it down when someone says “happy Friday”.
Happy Thursday
And it has a sharp point on the pin for when someone uses “a case of the Mondays”.
At first I read it as “Sorry to be a brother…” It’s hard to be a sibling sometimes.
Everyone should own one of these.
I came in here for a store link. 🤣
Look up “social battery level pin” (through eg. Qwant or Startpage, and don’t use an Amazon link or such). You’ll find it.
Oh yeah I found it already.
Extroverts dont have that AFAIK
They have it the other way around
They can just leave it at full.
Imagine a barista with a pin that says “Here are some of the soft skills that this job demands and which I lack.”
Yeah, this really is one of those things where if you’re not okay with a little idle chatter, it’s probably not the right job. And I say that out of admiration for baristas and other service workers. I tried working a service sector job when I was young and I didn’t last long. I just wasn’t any good at it.
I feel bad for folks who are introverted and not particularly strong. Almost every job with a low barrier to entry demands a lot of physical or emotional labour.
