Scheduling processes to balance out their CPU usage sounds too much like communism, so instead the processes using the most resources will be given an even bigger share, so they can use it to create jobs.

Several worms come pre-installed, because the best way to overcome viruses is through herd immunity.

Parent processes will not be able to terminate child processes, because life begins at execution.

There is only HTTP and not HTTPS to make sure you can’t visit any un-Christian websites in secret.

Multithreading sounds too much like multiculturalism, so it is not supported.

Only ASCII characters are supported, so the computer can’t communicate with China and give them our secrets.

Only available on CISC architectures, to make sure it can’t be infected by the trans agenda.