Kind of in disbelief right now. A far cry from how I felt back in November of 2024. If only I knew back then how severe the backlash against Trump would be in the midterms, I might not have been so despondent at that time. South fucking Carolina, and possibly FUCKING MISSISSIPPI have elected Democratic senators. Like…what???

Edit to add: Almost forgot, but Alaska might be going blue as well. Un fucking real.

Oh yeah, I forgot this fucking clown still exists. Talk about a wet blanket…

So when does Trump flee to Tel Aviv and leave this bumbling couch-fucker in charge? God, that would be hilarious.

Have a bigger one then.

Who in the GOP wants their hard drive searched the least? And why is it Mike Johnson?

We already knew all of this, but thanks, I guess…

So…Elon must be having trouble trying to rig the vote again, isn’t he?

Find out what exactly Trump meant when he said, “Elon knows those voting machines really well,” and then thanked him for giving him Pennsylvania. Those were quite fucking revealing comments, to say the least. Add on all those weird comments from his little meat shield kid, X-10101-cknvalkmcnvoefr, or whatever the fuck his name is. They stole the election, they committed treason, so give them the televised firing squad they so desire.

Want to join the FBI? First, you must demonstrate proficiency at mixed martial arts. Second, you must possess a deep desire to be penetrated by a horse’s cock. If you meet those criteria, congratulations! You officially qualify to be an agent in the FBI!

Looks like Ukraine missed one of Russia’s bot farms, er, “data center,” I mean…

Just give him a Nobel Prize for achievements in pants-shitting and child raping. Maybe that’ll get him to shut the fuck up.

The people with their hands up Trump’s shit encrusted asshole beg to differ.

Take your pick as to who’s financing this fucking goober. Russia, Mossad, Musk…we’ve basically got every foreign adversary on the planet running psyops on us at this point.

I would love to know how one interprets those comments as being somehow related to gas prices. But it’s hard for me to get in that mindset, seeing as my mother refrained from smoking meth while pregnant with me. And what’s really sad is that Iran would never even consider taking out any American city. Because we live in a world where the fucking Ayatollahs are the voice of reason in global politics.

I make a lot of jokes about my employer’s low standards for hiring people. Never thought I’d see the FBI limbo their way beneath that bar…Jesus.

Bet that’s hard on his heart.

Jim Bob in Arkansas is going to be awfully uncomfortable in the Wal Mart distribution center. But that stupid cousinfucker will keep supporting Trump, up until the last drop of moisture leaves his body.

When the only accounts that are allowed to exist on your platform are bots and Russian trolls, and you just ban actual long time users en masse for completely asinine and/or made up reasons, this is the fucking end result. Reddit is literally eating itself, but no! It’s AI that’s to blame. This fucking dogshit company literally just made me defend AI.

If Mitch were still alive, he’d be very offended by these accusations.

Sauerkraut really helps balance your gut health after doing rails of coke off a toilet seat. It’s science.