booty [he/him]

  • 6 Posts
  • 1.8K Comments
Joined 4 years ago
cake
Cake day: August 11th, 2020

help-circle




  • so she deserves whatever’s coming to her

    I did not say that. What I mean is that I find it extremely unlikely that someone who fears for her safety would keep this situation from the person whose actions are required to prevent her from being put in danger. I said that if you need someone to cover for your lie, you have to let them in on your lie. The implied logic being, therefore, if she didn’t, then she probably wasn’t that concerned about what would happen if OP did not cover for her lie. The consequences are probably a (rightfully) ruined relationship, not violence.


  • not even stopping to think about the possible violent repercussions of OPs actions

    I did think about it, but the bottom line is that if your safety relies on someone else keeping a secret for you, you need to let them in on the secret. If I’m seeing someone and they tell me that they have an abusive partner and that they’re technically cheating but that they’re only still in the relationship because they don’t know a way to get out of it, obviously I’m not saying anything to the partner (even given the possibility that it isn’t true)

    But you can’t expect someone to cover for your lie when you’ve been lying to them



    1. i know it’s not my relationship, i wasn’t involved. i am an internet person who has never met any of the relevant people commenting from a third party neutral perspective.

    2. when someone is being deeply wronged and they don’t know about it but you do, you are (in my opinion) morally obligated to inform them. and this is a very common point of view. it is extraordinarily normal for a person who is being cheated with to find out that the person they’ve been in a relationship with already has a partner and to then seek out that partner and inform them. it is standard practice. 99% of people agree that it is the correct course of action.

    cheating sucks. don’t cheat and you won’t have to worry about your partner being informed of your cheating